My first week here was pretty good. It was so busy, as it was a Parent Vision Trip (PVT). I have blogged about PVT’s in the past and they are really encouraging and I can see God doing a lot in families lives’. This month there was a mom who I could tell was so much closer to her child than she ever had been. It’s just always really sweet to watch parents come onto the mission field with their sons and daughters. It’s really encouraging to know that even if my family is in Wisconsin, God is still doing something in their hearts. Yep, I just said that. God is alive in every single person; He always has a plan and purpose for every person. That was confirmed as I oversaw some of the ministry here a few weeks ago.
So, why the graphic title? My heart is broken…I don’t think I’ve ever been so hungry for His sons and daughters to come back to Him. While I was encouraged and knew that God was stirring in the hearts of parents (and racers), there was some ministry during this week that I jumped in on and couldn’t believe my eyes. We are walking down the dirt roads, inviting children to the kids’ program and this older woman comes up bawling. Originally, we were all spending time with kids. God just really put her on my heart and with the basic Romanian I have I could tell something was wrong. She was limping and something was wrong with her leg. I asked a missionary to come over and help me translate what was going on. She lifted up her skirt so we could see her leg and without going into details, it was a very deep wound. I saw ligaments and muscles I never should. The story was that the woman was making gogosi (Romanian doughnuts) and the water fell off the stove and burned her. The worst part of this is she went to the doctor and they didn’t have the right medicine for her. Eventually one of the missionaries ended up going into a bigger city and got the medicine for her. But I couldn’t grasp that in my vicinity of ministy, this happens. I couldn’t grasp the fact that I live amongst the poor of the poor. This isn’t a “look at me.” I don’t want that…God has called me here, but I think it’s a form of culture shock. It’s heavy stuff. The truth is when God breaks you for a place, He’s going to break you in every way. Smith Wigglesworth agrees with this: “before God could bring me to this place He has broken me a thousand times.”
Is brokenness a bad thing? NO! Of course not. Brokenness is a sign of willingness. It’s a sign that you don’t want what the world has for you. You want what HE wants for you. You see what HE sees. You hear what HE hears. Don’t get me wrong, it’s hard! It’s so hard. My heart has been ripped apart for these people here in Oltenia, but I wouldn’t trade it for the heart I had prior to saying yes to this call. Heck no!
Last point, God breaks your heart, so He can use you as an open vessel. He breaks you for He then will work through you. God works through brokenness. This is all something I’m processing through, but I will tell you unless God tells me otherwise, nope….not leaving Romania.
